It’s probably pretty telling that not one of us tossed our lighter out with the smokes. Before the end of the night a couple of the group were begging smokes from other party goers. I lasted until dinner at the in-laws the next day and I stopped at bought a pack on the way over because I just knew I wouldn’t make it through the afternoon without one. The longest anyone lasted was about a week and by the end of the first week in January we were all back to smoking.

Flash forward a few years…

It’s the middle of summer and I’m sitting in the emergency room hooked up to the oxygen machine after what I thought was a second heart attack. (No, I didn’t quit smoking after the first one but that’s a story for another day.) On the way out the door after being released, I chucked my smokes in the garbage. That was a little over three years ago, and I haven’t had one since.

What’s the difference? Both decisions were the same — quit smoking cold turkey. Both actions I took were the same — chuck the smokes in the trash. So why was one action successful and the other doomed to failure from the start?

The difference, I’ve learned, is all in your mindset. The new year’s resolution, made in the heat of the moment was done with no sense of commitment, and if I’m honest with myself, no real intention of following through. I wasn’t ready to quit smoking, I knew it, and so I didn’t.

After my visit to the hospital I was ready to quit. I wasn’t making a decision based on what anyone else was doing. I was making a change to my life that would allow me to live longer and more healthfully. Alone in a hostile environment (I really dislike hospitals), my mindset was totally different than it had been on New Year’s Eve among friends.

The point to this is that most new year’s resolutions are doomed to failure from the minute we label them as such. The mindset attached to them is one of short term change. We make resolutions every year, so it’s no biggie if we don’t succeed. We’ll just resolve to do better the next year. At least we tried, right? This type of decision making in what amounts to a spur-of-the-moment manner really doesn’t bode well for making a successful change.

That’s not to say that making changes to better your life is a bad thing. It’s a great thing to want to change what you know isn’t working. Myself and hundreds of other personal development bloggers, authors, and speakers are only too happy to tell you how great it is, and how we love that you’re doing this.

But what you need to ensure your long term success is a plan and a system. By having a clear outcome in mind, and a way to keep yourself on track while you’re making changes, you will stand a much better chance at succeeding. It all starts with your mindset though, and the answer to the question — Am I making a new year’s resolution or a lifestyle change?

It’s also been productive because I found a way to keep myself on track most days. In addition to writing out my weekly goals and sending them to my accountability partner, I also started writing daily checklists of everything I wanted to get done. And I did all seven days worth on Saturday night so that I knew starting Sunday morning exactly what I needed to get done every single day this week. I’ve found that I need that structure in order to keep myself working and not wandering off to do other things like read or play too much on twitter. I also like the convenience of having a piece of paper in front of me all day long so that I’m continually reminded of what to do next, and also so that I have a place to jot down ideas as they occur instead of having to go looking for a notebook to write in.

The only downer this week is my month of posting on here took a hit Wednesday night. I was helping someone that night, and by the time we were finished I was so tired I just crawled into bed. It didn’t hit me until late Thursday that I had totally forgotten to write something the day before. I did do a post on my personal blog that day, but not sure if that counts toward my month of posting or if it all has to be on one blog. Maybe one of the NaBloPoMo folks can comment and let me know?

So without further ado, here’s this week’s roundup of posts:

Sunday – Week in Review
Monday – Why I’m Thankful to be Setting Goals
Tuesday – Four Tips For Setting Short Term Goals
Wednesday – Pumpkin Soup (on HelenaRitchie.com)
Thursday – The Necessity of Baby Steps in Setting Goals
Friday – A Christmas Story in the Making
Saturday – Top 10 Quotes on Setting Goals

And that was my week, in a nutshell. How was your week? Are you looking forward to the new week ahead? Don’t by shy, share your thoughts!

So tonight I shall defer to the experts and share with you my top 10 favorite quotes on setting goals.
There are so many great ones it’s hard to narrow it down, so this is my own personal preference. If you’ve got one to share, feel free to leave it in the comments.

1. People with goals succeed because they know where they’re going. – Earl Nightingale

2. This one step – choosing a goal and sticking to it – changes everything. – Scott Reed

3. What you get by achieving your goals is not as important as what you become by achieving yoru goals. – von Goethe

4. You must have long term goals to keep you from being frustrated by short term failures. – Charles. C. Noble

5. Setting goals for your game is an art. The trick is in setting them at the right level neither too low nor too high. – Greg Norman

6. By recording your dreams and goals on paper, you set in motion the process of becoming the person you most want to be. – Mark Victor Hansen

7. A goal is created three times. First as a mental picture. Second, when written down to add clarity and dimension. And third, when you take action towards its achievement. – Gary Ryan Blair

8. Reduce your plan to writing… The moment you complete this, you will have definitely given concrete form to the intangible desire. – Napoleon Hill

9. Obstacles are things a person sees when he takes his eyes off his goal. – E. Joseph Crossman

10. Setting goals is the first step in turning the invisible into the visible.- Anthony Robbins

Don’t forget to leave your favorite quotes on setting goals in the comments!

It sounds cliché, but the path to personal growth really does begin with a single step. What many people don’t realize is that the first step isn’t an actual physical step. It’s the mental preparation that you do before you start a new personal development journey that determines how successful you are in making the changes you desire.

Having an optimistic mindset means letting go of any baggage from your past that could be holding you back. I realize that it’s hard to let go of some things — heck, even I’m still hanging on to things from the past that would be better put to rest — but the whole purpose of this journey you’re about to embark on is to grow. And it’s harsh to say, but some things really are better off left in the dust as you move forward.

With that being said, I want to give you three tips today that you can put to use on your path.

1. Be kind to yourself.

Everyone makes mistakes, but only a fool lets those mistakes stop him/her from trying again. Don’t be afraid to pick yourself up, dust yourself off, and start all over again. (Yes, I swiped that line from the old song ‘Pick Yourself Up’.) Whatever you do, don’t beat yourself up over what went wrong. Be kind and encouraging to yourself as you make a fresh start.

2. Retool your plan.

No matter how hard we try for the perfect plan, it just ain’t gonna happen. Life gets in the way and sometimes the goals we set for ourselves just aren’t reasonable. Many a plan has failed because its creator over-estimated what they could accomplish at the time. Don’t be afraid to sim;plify to get your desired results. Try setting three goals instead of thirty, and you’ll find it’s easier to achieve them because it’s easier to focus on them. When you complete one, add another to the list and before you know it, all thirty of the goals on your original list will be met and you’ll be creating another new set things to accomplish.

3. Take Action Now!

It’s important to get moving once you make the decision to move. The last thing you want to do is procrastinate at taking the first step. The more you wait and watch the days go by, the harder it gets to start and the more depressed you begin to feel. Don’t worry if your first few actions don’t work quite the way you intended. You’ll know before long if you’ve made a totally wrong move. And if that happens, you simply start over at step one — that would be dusting yourself off, in case you forgot already — and repeat the process. After all, your plans aren’t set in stone — or at least they shouldn’t be — and you might just have stumbled upon an awesome opportunity that you never would have if you hadn’t taken action.

So there you have it, an easy three step plan for starting down the path to personal growth. I look forward to sharing a few steps with you and hearing about your journey. (Hint: that means don’t be shy — leave a comment!)